Rituals....Why???

Read this Story in the Sunday Times. A girl called off her wedding just a month before the D-Day. Reason??..She wasnt in love with someone else, She hadnt developed cold feet at the thought of being married. She just didnt agree with the rituals her prospective in-laws believed in. What was the ritual that offended her so much?..She was asked to oil massage her husbands' feet on the wedding night, clean it up and ask for permission to share his bed !!! She was further shocked when her UK-educated Investment Banker fiance did nothing to resist or oppose this.

Now many would think that it was irrational on her part to cancel the wedding on this issue. What was the harm in going through one ritual, afterall, they are just namesake but are they?  Supporters would insist that these rituals are the part of our rich Indian Culture, our heritage ,our values and what not. But why these rituals if I may ask are subservient to the males of our society? Isnt it demeaning and insulting for a woman to oil massage her husbands' feet and ask for permission to share his bed? 

Then there are numerous rituals of Vrats or Fasts that a woman has to perform to make sure that her husband lives a hundred years. Why dont men keep these Fasts? Dont they want their wives to live for a hundred years?

I kept the fast of Karva Chauth this year and my husband fasted along with me because he loves me a lot and when I chose to go hungry for his sake, he reciprocated for mine. Nowadays, many husbands are doing that but what about those not-so-supportive husbands? Its a very big deal and the woman is considered very lucky if her husband fasts along with her but there is no big deal when a woman goes a whole day without food and water- it is expected from her.

Am I sounding feminist here?.. Lets talk logically then. These Rituals are hardly practical. Most of the Women are working these days and time is precious for a jetsetting woman who is juggling between home and office work. Rituals dont ensure that a marriage lasts a lifetime, it is the mutual love, respect and understanding that keeps the big ship of wedding afloat.